A scruff-edged exploration of borderline personality disorder with poignant depth lingering beneath its surface
Is there a funny side to borderline personality disorder? That’s Not My Name certainly thinks so.
Sammy Trotman’s explosive one-woman show wants to illuminate life with borderline personality disorder without getting bogged down in trauma. It’s a difficult path to traverse. The result is a structureless mishmash of fluctuating tones. The show is strongest when it looks at living and struggling with mental illness, but its ostentatious comedy is overly keen to shock. It is a difficult show to decipher, but it is possible.
Most of That’s Not My Name is a self-aware stand-up set helmed by a hyper diva-like version of Trotman. Halfway between knowingly self-indulgent and gleefully narcissistic, it’s hard to tell how intentional the clunky audience participation and bevy of graceless gags are. The slapstick abuse of two stagehands who briefly join Trotman on stage is jarring, and a schmaltzy musical number about the Electra Complex detailing Trotman’s blurred perception of the line between boyfriends and fathers is eager to be more outrageous than it is.
Yet Trotman is a dextrous performer who keeps her cards close to her chest. Beneath the chaos lies a silent tragedy that she gently unravels when unpicking real-life traumatic anecdotes from boarding school, family life and institutionalisation.
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In one sequence she embodies one of her emotionally unstable personalities: a child with a woolly hat, absorbed in infantile curiosity. The irreverent free-for-all is set aside for a few tender moments when we catch a glimpse of the production’s bloodshot heart – Trotman’s inner turmoil at living with borderline personality disorder.
But this is no pity party, Trotman brilliantly pulls the rug from under us by revealing that she is a clinically diagnosed sociopath and then goads the audience for believing her in the first place. Now all the cards are on the table, except there are no longer any rules and no table.
That’s Not My Name uses brash impressionist brush strokes to paint a vivid self-portrait. It could languish in gratuitousness, but Trotman keeps it light, dousing it with crass silliness then setting it on fire.
Her temerity must be applauded, she hits her bullseye, criticising the insufficiency of labels and the failure of the medical establishment to provide genuine support, but she’s throwing darts in all directions. The script is inefficient and overstuffed with frivolous humour. With some focused refinement this could pack a serious theatrical punch.
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