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Diary: The Kardashians are pulling Billie Piper back to reality

Billie Piper in Yerma. Photo: Johan Persson
Billie Piper in Yerma. Photo: Johan Persson
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An actor’s pre or post-show ritual can offer you a window into their soul. Whether you want to look or not is your own business, but Tabard finds the whole thing fascinating.

To stay sane when embodying Rooster Byron every day, Mark Rylance is said to have developed a nightly ritual during his time performing in Jerusalem, something which he allegedly passed on to Denise Gough. In an interview she revealed that she has her own meditative rituals – incense, opening and closing one’s chakras etc – in order to shake off her characters before she goes home.

It’s hardly surprising. Actors haul themselves into these life and death scenarios, baring their souls to punters, only for the curtain to come down and for everyone to expect them to take off their make-up and head down the pub.

But the process is much more complex, so it’s little wonder many seek something more spiritual. Someone should tell Billie Piper; she’s slogging away every night in Yerma in what is widely considered the most earth-shatteringly distressing performance on stage right now, and yet Tabard hears she unwinds after performances by watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Too right. In Tabard’s book, no matter what fresh hell you’ve been through on stage, no matter how many people you’ve killed or times you’ve been killed, it’s always best to unwind by watching Kim get vaginal laser hair removal. Keep it up Piper.

Send stories to tabard@thestage.co.uk

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