Forget The Phantom of the Opera, these days everyone’s talking about ‘The Phantom of the Poopera’ (sorry). Because while the West End’s dirtiest problem is the scourge of scurrying mice, across the pond, Broadway has been struck by an even muckier culprit that has been making their own disgusting mark on the Great White Way.
An anonymous poo-petrator has been plaguing Broadway tryouts, giving a whole new meaning to having a “crap audition”. Fast gaining notoriety, the offender – now affectionately known as Broadway’s “mystery pooper” – first struck at auditions for Magic Mike the Musical last month, when somebody slipped on what onlookers say appeared to be “a fresh pile”.
“There was a lot of disbelief,” an actor told the New York Post. “She stopped and said: ‘Oh, I just stepped in shit.’ We all laughed thinking she was using the slang version of ‘shit’ to mean general mess, but then we all began to smell it.”
Not content with soiling just one Magic Mike audition, the phantom soiler subsequently dropped a number two at another tryout for the show the following week.
Despite the delight these events have brought the Broadway community – think musical theatre-inspired spoof videos – the mystery pooper is yet to be unmasked. Until then, all that remains is for us to wait with bated breath for the vile villain to strike for a turd time.