There are days in the world of a dedicated TV blogger where the muse just does not come - and when the biggest story of the day is that the BBC has spent £10m on flights in the last 12 months (do we care? No, we do not), then I don’t blame the muse for staying in bed and having a metaphorical duvet day.
So where do we go when inspiration has (hopefully) temporarily left us? It may be shelter for a desperate man, but sometimes a good old-fashioned Top Five can be a Godsend, and today I’m going for a subject dear to my heart - TV title sequences.
I love title sequences, and a recent trawl through Youtube unearthed a piece from Charlie Brooker’s Screen Wipe with actor Matt Berry (The IT Crowd/The MIghty Boosh), in which he bemoans the lack of decent, stylish, tone-setting title sequences:
And he is, of course, correct, rightly feting the late theme-tune composer Ronnie Hazlehurst at being a master of using theme tunes in concert with title sequences to set tone and mood. And so I got to thinking of my own personal favourite title sequences from decades of viewing, some that are just brilliant and some that have become camp classics. In reverse order…
5) MAS*H (1972-83)
Using footage from Robert Altman’s film and a haunting musical rendition of Johnny Mandel’s Oscar winning theme, Suicide is Painless, the title sequence for MAS*H stayed fairly constant throughout the 11 year run, and in many ways, mis-sold the early episodes of this legendary show. With much resistance from the production team, the early episodes were more slapstick sitcom, complete with laugh track. While the laugh track remained, it was used more sparingly as the series developed into a more thoughtful, harder hitting drama that used the comedy as an antidote to the blood and suffering of war.
4) The Professionals (1977-83)
Not the more familiar titles featuring lots of zooming in on Gordon Jackson’s cashmere coat, but the sublimely wonderful original opening credits to the late 70s action series. It’s a fast and furious mishmash of Bodie and Doyle storming through an assault course, having being dropped of by Cowley in a Roller - clearly CI5 had a huge budget. It’s hysterical to watch now, but has a certain mad charm, and has Laurie Johnson’s still-recognisable theme tune that acts as a polar opposite to his earlier and more elegant music for The Avengers.
3) Doctor Who (1963- present)
The 1974-1980 variety. A no-brainer really. The Tardis, Tom Baker, that theme tune. Need I say more?
2) The Simpsons (1989-present)
A true classic that has endured for nearly 20 years with nary a change. This fast and frenetic splash of colour is a perfect marrying of titles and theme, with Danny Elfman’s theme matching every frame perfectly. It’s instantly recognisable and is now an indelible artefact of popular culture. How many of us beep along with Marge and Maggie in the car, and Doh! as Homer is nearly run down by Bart (possibly just me on that one)? And the stroke of genius here is the notion of having a clever motif that changes every week as the family rush to that sofa - whether a full on song and dance routine or just the Flintstone family sitting there, this is guaranteed to keep us watching those titles all the way through.
1) The Tomorrow People (1973-79)
Controversial, perhaps, but this takes my personal top spot for so many reasons. First, it has one of the best theme tunes of all time, topping perhaps even Doctor Who. Dudley Simpson (who also composed the theme for Blake’s 7 and scored countless episodes of vintage Who) provided a haunting, scary piece that would be guaranteed to send shivers down the spine of my just home from school younger self. And the visuals hide The Tomorrow People’s early 1970s origins with its polished yet freakish, nightmare images of opening hands, flowers, the universe, mixed in with dynamic views of the cast. In fact, this is one case where the title sequence is actually better than the show itself in its stylish overselling of what was essentially a lovable but outrageously camp children’s adventure series. Glorious!
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